A Letter to Myself

One of the exercises we did when I got back from Fiji last year was to write a letter to ourselves. Pioneers would mail it to us three months later, and the idea was to read it then.

Well....I saved mine - for a long time.  I planned on opening it when I went through a really low period.  For me, that was this weekend.  I was a bit weary and just tired of waiting.  I felt hopeless as far as everything goes towards this whole visa process.

This letter helped so incredibly much.  It reminded me of all the mighty things God has already done, and reminded me to trust in God's faithfulness and provision.  It's an encouragement to remember that the same God I've grown to love and know more this past year, will go with me to England :)

July 23, 2014

Allison,

If you're getting this in November, know that I am praying now that God has led you exactly where you need to be - whether thats a job, staying at home still, etc.  After this summer, please remember that you can trust God has you in the exact place He wants and needs you to be.  Don't belittle or put yourself down, or let others put you down, for where you are and what you're doing now!

Remember all the ways God provided for you on this trip.  He led you to find this organization, He gave you the strength and drive to fill out this application, to share your story with others, to humbly as for funds (which He FAITHFULLY provided!), He gave community to support you, He showed you areas you struggles and needed healing, He equipped you to lead a team of strangers overseas, He went before you and prepared the hearts of every person you met, He kept you healthy when others were sick, He provided food to sustain you, He gave you strength to keep going when you were weak, He eliminated the fear of leaving family (yes you missed them, but realized you had family in God, too!), He answered prayers, He brought you home safe - He provided and was faithful!  Don't forget that - ever.

Don't be scared.  Don't be shy.  Go with courage, knowing God has already prepared the way for you beforehand.  You can't mess His plan up, you won't mess it up for someone! Remember your job is to cast the seeds and collect the harvest.  God does the growing - not you.

Keep praying for health - keep bothering God for that!  He wants us to beg and cry out to Him. DON'T STOP.  Don't be ashamed to fall in weakness and ask for help - God wants us in those moments so He can be glorified even more.

I pray you continue to express your interest in missions to those around you.  Tell them what God has done and is doing in your heart.  Be part of the 10,000 who are reaching the unreached, whether that's Turkey or somewhere else.  Don't let fears creep back in.  Your family will survive and go on without you.  You can survive without them, too.  If God has called you to this, trust He will provide.  That goes for finances, too.  Don't be afraid of the support.  It will come.  Pray about it, and God will answer.

My heart is scared right now that you'll forget and get fearful and get stuck.  Please seek the Lord for guidance.  Please continue submitting all of your desires and expectations and dreams and hopes to Him.  Don't try to plan it all out - give God your availability, let Him move in your life :)

I know there may be pain or struggles you're facing now that I can't imagine, but remember God is sovereign.  He is in control and turns ALL situations into good for you.  Keep your trust and faith in Him and Him alone!

"Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, How great Thou art!"