Waves
That's the best word I can use to describe the past few weeks since losing our baby. Some days are ok - I get through the day with holding back tears. Others, I cry myself to sleep at night. It's the smallest thoughts or sights that set off emotions. When I observe how big Levi is getting, I get so sad. Our baby will never get as big as Levi - and when/if we have another, he's going to look even MORE gigantic. When we pray at night, I got so sad in the beginning when Mark would just give thanks for Levi. Now, he makes sure to give thanks for both of our children. I put on a pair of leggings that fit just fine, followed by a pair of shorts. My heart broke because all I wanted was to be too big for them. I lay down and my belly is flat - no more little bump. My body is going through small postpartum things that I experienced with Levi. I've had so much hair loss in the past week - another reminder of what I should have experienced in 2021. I went to go to the gym at w
